What’s Beef? (Climate Change Version)

by: Baba Brinkman

What's Beef? (Climate Change Version)

Lyrics

Do you know what beef is?
Do you really know what beef is?

Ha ha ha ha ha, check out this bizarre
Person tryin’ to claim that global warming isn’t human-caused
Anthropogenic climate change skeptic
Convinced that the liberal media’s out to get them
Sometimes they tell us that the warming isn’t happening
Other times it’s happening but it’s just a natural thing
Their views vary and remain contrarian
Economically they’re invariably libertarian
They think government’s already too massive
And climate change is just a scam to expand it
Commonly you can find them on a comment stream
Anonymously commenting
Cherry-pickin’ a bit of temperature data
And tryin’ to claim that climate change is in hiatus
It’s not, the trends are still going straight up
But they ain’t tryin’ to change their minds once they’re made up
So now the scientists know, but the public doesn’t
They think the government can’t be trusted, it’s up to somethin’
Either they deny there’s a consensus
Or they view it through conspiracy lenses

What’s beef, beef is when the scientific findings all agree
Beef is when the public perceives controversy
Beef is when the contrarian view
With no data supporting it, still gets through

What’s beef, beef is the whole field of climatology
Beef is ninety seven pe rcent against three
Beef is when your worldview
Predetermines what you don’t believe and what you do

In the eyes of deniers the science is biased
‘Cause temperature changed rapidly up in the younger Dryas
And if climate really changed in the past
With no fossil fuels, well, what’s up with that?
First portray the science as nothin’ but shaky guesswork
Then cite the research of a bunch of fake experts
There’s a formula and some are paid to follow it
But most of them are just in an echo-chamber that swallowed it
And some are even smart as whips and sharp as tacks
All that cleverness just makes them clever with the facts
They emphasize the controversy and uncertainty
Like: “We should probably just wait and keep researching”
Science always has to deal with probabilities
But how we interpret them reveals our flexibility
If it’s a one percent terrorist threat, that’s a killing spree
Better invest in the military
But when the science is 98% confident
About the climate, they say “scientists admit dissent”
That’s the method, scientists have to admit it
I guess they need some backup from rappers who get it

What’s beef, beef is when the scientific findings all agree
Beef is when the public perceives controversy
Beef is when the contrarian view
With no data supporting it, still gets through

What’s beef, beef is the whole field of climatology
Beef is ninety seven pe rcent against three
Beef is when your worldview
Predetermines what you don’t believe and what you do

So what about my worldview, how was it shaped?
A liberal Canadian, environmentally raised
When I was thirteen, my mama was working
On her masters on climate change researching
And my dad ran a company that planted trees
Takin’ carbon out the atmosphere with forestry
In 1992 my mama’s thesis
Was about CO2 and Svante Arrhenius
So if you try to tell me that climate change isn’t serious
You’re dissin’ my mama, yup I’m kinda cliquish
People tend to believe what their friends believe
And believe the opposite of perceived enemies
So pick a team, baby, what’s it gonna be?
Is it team Trump or team green energy?
Don’t get me started on the other “conspiracies”
GMOs, nuclear power, vaccines
Nine eleven, evolution and creationism
I’m takin’ the scientific mainstream position
Unless you’ve got some major evidence to overturn it
Major evidence, not your cherry-pickin’ kernels
And the scientific mainstream in climate change
Says it’s happening, it’s dangerous, and yeah it’s man-made
And there’s a debate, but it’s not against the few who doubt it
The debate is what to do about it

What’s beef, beef is when the scientific findings all agree
Beef is when the public perceives controversy
Beef is when the contrarian view
With no data supporting it, still gets through

What’s beef, beef is the whole field of climatology
Beef is ninety seven pe rcent against three
Beef is when your worldview
Predetermines what you don’t believe and what you do

Do you know what beef is?
Do you really know what beef is?
In this case, beef is clearly a metaphor
For political disagreements
Fuelled by divergent interpretations
Of scientific data
Stop the violence y’all

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